Swindon Businesswoman Organises Concert for Dementia

Forgetting conversations and making strange sandwiches were the first signs which told Amanda Franks something wasn’t quite right with her mum.

That was seven years ago before Cathy, aged just 58, was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease.

Coinciding with Dementia Awareness Week (18th – 25th May) mum-of-one Amanda, aged 39, is determined to help more people understand this “hidden subject” and also raise money for much-needed research by Alzheimer’s Research UK.

Amanda, who owns recruitment agency Frankly Recruitment, from Oakhurst, said: “This disease turned our whole world upside down and at first we didn’t really know anything about it. Initially we were a bit in denial and tried to laugh it off, as it seemed the only way to cope.

“It was only when we confronted it and started to get proper help that the situation gradually improved. Although things will never be the same again, you learn to adapt and accept it. But it still seems very much a taboo, which people want to sweep under the carpet. That’s why the new national Dementia Friends campaign, involving celebrities, is such a good thing because it’s bringing the disease out in the open and getting people to talk about it.”

Earlier this year Cathy, now 63, moved out of the home she shared with her husband John in Greenmeadow and now lives in a care home nearby.

Amanda said: “It’s great because it’s just round the corner from me and dad visits every other day. He gave up his job, as an aircraft engineer a couple of years ago, to become her full-time carer. But the disease took over so this wasn’t possible any more – he couldn’t cope and she needed specialist support in more suitable surroundings. Although it took a while to settle in, her consultant has been fantastic and we can see she’s in the right place. Our lives have also gone a bit more back to normality.”

In between work and looking after her 11-year-old son Daniel, Amanda is organising a special concert called The Gig to Remember with all proceeds going towards Alzheimer’s Research UK.

Amanda said: “At the beginning we thought mum was depressed. She was drinking a bit too much wine in the evenings and could become irritable. She also started forgetting previous conversations – once I remember her swearing blind she wouldn’t let dad buy a black car then the next day she said, perfectly seriously, shall we get one? When she became quite adamant she hadn’t ever said anything against the idea, we thought this had to be something more serious. We actually made the doctor’s appointment before telling her, just in case she resisted.”

She was referred to the memory clinic, which confirmed cognitive impairment and that her memory was significantly less for someone of her age.

“They did the same tests 6 months later, to measure the deterioration. Within a year we had the diagnosis of early onset dementia, confirming our worst fears. Nothing quite prepares you for it because you know from that point you’re never going to get your mum back – the mum who ruled the roost and looked after all of us rather than the other way round,” she said.

Simple tasks became puzzling – like lifting the curtains up and down, not knowing how to draw them or going to the hairdressers and asking her daughter or husband how she wanted to have it cut.

“It was so sad, watching that slip away. Doing the ironing, ironically, was the last thing she held onto. In the end she was just emptying the washing machine, putting it in the dryer, ironing and then washing it straight away so the ironing could begin again, “Amanda said.

To find out more about dementia go to www.dementiafriends.org.uk

Tickets for the Gig to Remember, featuring the renowned Bootleg Beatles at the Swindon Oasis on 14th November, go on sale on 1st June. For more information see www.thegigtoremember.com or email [email protected]